This past Sunday ended season two of Euphoria. Sam Levinson’s 8 episodes explored betrayal, substance abuse, and the descent into insanity. Oh, and I guess also the lives of the characters. The bizarre season had me asking, almost daily, “did the writing team die?” As the season ended and honed in on the Author’s mouthpiece, Lexi, Euphoria as bizarre vanity project emerged. My parasocial crush, Drew Gregory described it best, as akin to Duchamp’s Fountain, art filled with piss. Drowned in the metaphorical writer’s piss were half of the plot lines of the season. 

To openly process eight unexplainable hours, I list below several questions, mostly from my notes app. 

• What happened to Kat’s depression? Or like… Kat in general. I loved her last season, and I was excited to see some kind of development or consequences coming from her hypersexuality (and CP) last season. But no, If Barbie isn’t in fetish gear, why would she be given a plot?
• Same with Jules… what’s up in her life? How’s being nonbinary treating her? Has she made any cool pants lately? When did she get so close to Kat, Cassie, and Maddy? Is she vegetarian? Are those cool lesbians in the city doing okay? I just wish we got any substance about her. 
• Did Rue really just get clean because her mom said “kill yourself?” My family has a robust collection of alcoholics, meth heads, and addicts, but none of them got clean because of one 5 minute conversation. If they did, I hope it was a little more compelling than the exchange here. 
• Rue got clean?
• Did she talk to Ali or make amends with him?
• Is Gia going to pass her math test?
• What in the LGBT was happening between Samantha and Maddy? As an audience, we deserve a gay milf moment. 
• Where is Maddy going? Remember last season, talking about how Maddy only wants to be a wife and mom. Damn, it would have been easy to work in a story line about her finding an interest in fashion, child care, or I don’t know, marine biology. 
• Speaking of going to college: McKay are you there? Do you need help?
• Laurie …. At multiple times we thought she would kill people, sell drugs, sell Rue, etc … but no, she does nothing. It feels… icky…. to dangle the threat of sex trafficking’s a young, queer, black addict, but as a one episode plot twist. I don’t hold this show to be a moral compass, but Jesus Christ, if you are going to insinuate this sort of situation, pay the real suffering of people like Rue more than lip service.
• But if I am going to moralize, why is there so much drunk driving? Weirdly, this comes off as more irresponsible than the drugs. Like, Kaleigh in Massachusetts probably doesn’t know where to get heroin, but she might just drive herself to the cheesecake factory after the homecoming pregame
• Okay one last moral: did Rue hurt anyone in those car crashes? Like, is there any resisting arrest/breaking and entering/theft follow up?
• Is Fez dead? Does Lexi know? Is Lexi’s mom not worried about Lexi’s relationship with a drug dealer? Also why has Rue never commented on her two best friends getting into a romantic entanglement?
• How did Ashtray not pick up on the recording device? That kid is too smart and obedient to Fezco to just kill someone on the couch.
• Who the hell funded that play? Or printed the playbills? 
• But like, why did Nate give Jules the DVD? Like what does that accomplish if he was going to turn his dad in?
• Who’s side of the fight was vape girl on?
• Why did Dominic Fike get a long acoustic guitar solo when we don’t even know if certain characters are alive or afoot?

I’ll cut myself off here. In true Lutheran fashion, I could write 95 little complaints. Euphoria is renewed for a third season. I can only anticipate it will grow as abstract, unexplainable, and excruciatingly beautiful as a Bjork video.